People like Kao Ming-shan are what make Tzu Chi the organization it is today. They think nothing of their contributions to the foundation, taking their efforts as a matter of course. Actually, Kao not only donates a great deal of money, but also dedicates himself wholeheartedly to carrying out the Tzu Chi missions, often providing assistance and care for others. Being a volunteer has become his full-time occupation. When others praise him, he answers, "What I have done is really nothing. Compared with those who line up to do volunteer work, my contributions are entirely trivial."

A successful entrepreneur

Master Cheng Yen once described Kao as a rich man, both spiritually and materially. Before he joined Tzu Chi, he had enjoyed a successful career in industry. After graduating from university, he went into the building trade and opened his own construction company. Later, he joined his brother and started another business making and selling ceramics. The enterprise flourished and money rolled in, and he became a gleaming example of a successful businessman. Things went on smoothly until he invested in a securities firm.

Some time after he became a stockholder, a financial crisis hit the company. Afraid that the firm might have to close down, the other stockholders asked Kao to advance them the money required to save the firm, promising in writing that they would return the money to him after the crisis was over. In order to save both the company and his reputation, Kao sold off several pieces of land and took out more than NT$5 billion [US$17 million]. However, after the crisis was over, the stockholders backed out of the deal and refused to pay back their shares. Their attitude towards him took an abrupt turn: whereas before they had been cordial and friendly towards him, after the unfavorable event they only gave him the cold shoulder. He was bitterly disappointed and disillusioned about the positive side of human nature.

"I was full of hatred at that time," he remembered. "I hated the maliciousness and inconstancy of human nature. I had lived up to forty-nine years of age without ever running into any difficulty, but this time I took a serious fall." Having lost so much money, he worried that he might not be able to repay the debts he owed to others. He lost all appetite for food, suffered from insomnia, and became extremely despondent.

One day when he was at the lowest ebb of his life, he went to a barbershop that he often patronized. There, he came across Li Cheng-fu, a nodding acquaintance of his, who was enthusiastically talking about Tzu Chi and its charitable missions to other customers in the shop. Li seemed a different person from the man Kao had known before. Fond of drinking and gambling, he used to lead a "colorful" life, so Kao rarely had any dealings with him. Li knew that Kao had lost a lot of money trading in securities. Seeing how haggard and worn-down Kao was, Li suggested that he go with him to Hualien to visit Master Cheng Yen the following day. Maybe, he said, the Master could give him some advice and help extricate him from his mire of misery.

Desperate, Kao decided to give it a try. After all, he had nothing to lose. When he saw the Master, he complained at length to her about his misfortune. "You are a very competent man," the Master said to him softly. "You've made so much money while you are still so young. Since you are so capable, what else is there to worry about?" The Master advised him to rise above adversity and not be tied down by it. The sooner he let go of his attachments to grief, remorse, and other such negative emotions, the sooner he would be a free man.

Afterwards, he often spent time with the Master and other Tzu Chi people. Witnessing the selfless, altruistic spirit of the volunteers, who always pitched in to help the needy without ever thinking of receiving anything in return, he came to realize that all his suffering came from his basic greed. He could not resign himself to the fact that the wealth he had painstakingly accumulated over the years had gone down the drain just like that. But he knew that if he kept holding on to his resentment and anger, his health would deteriorate and things would only get worse. His wife, who had been studying and practicing Buddhism for years, also told him, "If losing so much money can eliminate your bad karma of greed and delusion, you should consider it a blessing rather than bad fortune."

Of course, it was not so easy for him to forgive and forget. But he urged himself to forgive little by little. "I tried to forgive a little today, a little tomorrow. By and by, the burden on my shoulders seemed to have lifted." His brother helped him liquidate his assets and properties, and after he had cleared all his debts, there was still some money left. The pressure he had felt dissolved, and he was finally able to feel peaceful and at ease.

Since then, he has rearranged the priorities in his life. He shifted his attention from making money to doing volunteer work. "However much I may earn, I may not be able to keep it. Money has legs--sometimes it runs away from you."

He fully enjoys the happiness of giving and often donates money or the works of art that he has collected to Tzu Chi to help with its charity work. "Giving actually makes you happier than holding things in your hands," he said. "The more you have, the more you want to have. But once you begin to give things away, you feel free and unburdened and your heart, with its reduced desire, will grow broader."

Looking back, he is grateful to those who hurt him in the past. Without them, he would still be one who chases after wealth. He would not have become a Tzu Chi volunteer and reached out to help others. He said he used to be selfish and arrogant, but Tzu Chi helped him "take off his mask and see his real face."

Participating in good deeds

Kao has participated in various aid programs launched by the foundation. In the nine years since he joined Tzu Chi, he has gone with Tzu Chi relief teams to mainland China and visited many remote areas there to deliver emergency relief supplies, help the poor, build schools and offer scholarships. Sometimes he had to spend several months a year in China. Occasionally he felt tired, because as soon as he came back from China he had to prepare to go on another trip. "I wondered if I should slow down a bit. But then I found that I felt empty if I didn't go out to do volunteer work, as if there were something missing in my life."

The feedback he receives from the people Tzu Chi has helped is another driving force that motivates him to keep going. He remembers that four years ago he went with other Tzu Chi volunteers to deliver relief supplies in Fujian Province, China. In one of the villages they visited, two children gave them cards as presents. Later he found out that they had worked hard to earn the money for the cards. They plucked tea leaves and made only five Renminbi [US$0.60] a day. These two children came early in the morning to one of the distribution sites to help Tzu Chi volunteers with the distribution work. When lunchtime came, they still didn't return home to eat. Asked why they didn't go home, they answered, "If we go home for lunch, we won't be able to say goodbye to you when you leave." Kao couldn't help admiring how pure these children's hearts were. "There was also a child who told me that he really envied us for being able to do such meaningful things. By helping them, we were planting the seed of goodness in their hearts."

Tzu Chi regularly follows up on its aid recipients. When Kao visited them and found that because of the foundation's help, people who hadn't had a roof to shelter them were now able to live in warm houses and children who previously couldn't go to school were now starting to attend classes, his heart leapt with indescribable joy. "That literally made us forget all our hard work and our suffering during the bumpy, long journeys from one village to another."

Kao always reminds himself to watch over his heart when he is helping others. "Merely helping others is not enough," he said. "What is important is to help with true love and real compassion. When you don't have real compassion, you will be lacking in patience, thoughtfulness and care, and those who receive aid from you won't be able to feel love."

Always ready to pitch in

Kao is the executive director of the Tzu Chi Seattle branch office. His family now lives in that city, and he allocates his time between Taiwan and America. In a rich place like Seattle few people are in need of material help, so Tzu Chi volunteers there focus their attention more on bone marrow donation drives and the Tzu Chi missions of education and culture. He is the principal of the Seattle Tzu Chi Humanities School, which has more than a hundred students. The school offers courses on Master Cheng Yen's Still Thoughts, propagates the spirit of Great Love, and teaches Chinese history and culture. His wife is also a devoted Tzu Chi volunteer; the two of them keep each other company on the road to selfless giving.

Mother Teresa once said, "We cannot do great things on this earth. We can only do small things with great love." What Tzu Chi volunteers like Kao have done may be "small things," but they have done them with Great Love. "I am still learning. I urge myself to keep participating in Tzu Chi missions so that my compassion can grow and my heart won't lie wasted. Helping others is a good way to develop our compassion and enhance our sense of gratitude."

In the past, he was an ambitious businessman, and he lived under constant pressure to reach the goals he had set for himself. He described himself as being insatiable--if he had nine shares of something, he could never take his eyes off the missing tenth share. Now he understands that to give is a greater blessing than to receive, and a man who can give happily to others is the richest man in the world. He often encourages himself with the Master's words: "If we have good intentions in our hearts but do not carry them out, it is like plowing a field without planting any seeds--nothing good will come of it." With this saying in mind, he is ready to pitch in whenever Tzu Chi needs him.